Letting Go of “My Money”

Teaching lesson

One of the things Joshua and I had to learn early in our marriage was to let go of the idea of “my money.”

When we first got married, we realised that we approached finances very differently. I was a saver and very focused on investments. Much of the financial advice I had received from people in the financial sector emphasised planning for the future and building long-term security.

Joshua, on the other hand, had a very different approach. He was more of a spender who believed in enjoying life today. Saving for the long haul did not naturally come to him the way it did for me.

Those differences could easily have created tension between us.

One of the turning points came when we decided to begin doing a joint monthly budget. That process required a level of honesty and vulnerability that was not always easy, but it began to change how we saw our finances.

Instead of thinking in terms of “my money” or “your spending,” we started to recognise that we were stronger when we planned together.

Over time, that shift helped us develop new habits. We began planning our monthly budget together and discussing financial decisions before spending.

It reminded us that financial unity is not just about numbers. It is about partnership, trust, and shared responsibility.

Letting go of “my money” helped us strengthen the sense that we were truly building our life together.