Making Time That Communicates Love

Teaching lesson

They had been in the same room for nearly an hour. One was answering messages while the other moved between a programme on television and a list of things to do. When they finally looked at each other, it was time to go to bed.

They had shared a room, but very little of themselves.

Many couples recognise this experience. Being together physically can make us feel that time for connection has already happened. Yet our attention may have been somewhere else throughout the evening.

Paul urges believers to walk wisely and make good use of their time. His words concern the whole of Christian living. They also invite us to consider how our everyday use of time reflects what we value.

For a married couple, that includes giving the relationship a place within the day.

This is not always simple. Work schedules differ. Children need care. Illness and other responsibilities can limit what is possible. Comparing your time with another couple's routine may leave you discouraged without helping you connect.

Begin with the life you actually have. Where is there a small opportunity to be available to each other? It may be a few minutes before the household wakes, a short walk or a conversation after the evening tasks are finished.

Agree on a time that works for both of you. Put aside whatever can reasonably wait. Let the moment include something beyond arrangements and reminders. Ask about a feeling, a concern or something your spouse enjoyed.

If an unexpected demand interrupts you, acknowledge it and arrange another opportunity. Following through communicates care, even when the original plan has to change.

Your spouse does not need an elaborate occasion every time you connect. They need to experience that you are willing to make room for them.

Look at today's schedule together. Ask God for wisdom to use one small part of it well, and let your attention say, 'I am glad to be here with you.'