When Comfort Keeps Us from Growing
Addictions
Day 11 of 21 · Tuesday 12 May 2026
Scripture reading
“And he said to them all, If any man will come after me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross daily, and follow me.”
Luke 9:23, KJV
Teaching lesson
They were not fighting.
They were not planning to leave.
But they had stopped trying.
No date nights. No thoughtful words. No extra effort. No little acts of love.
The marriage was surviving but not growing.
Sometimes the problem is not a crisis. Sometimes the problem is comfort.
We get used to each other. We assume love is understood. We tell ourselves, “They know how I feel.” But marriage cannot grow on assumptions alone.
Love must be shown.
In many homes, after work, children, ministry, cooking, cleaning, and the normal pressures of life, it is easy to give your spouse whatever energy is left over. But leftover love rarely builds a strong marriage.
Jesus calls us to deny ourselves. In marriage, that sometimes means choosing effort when we feel tired. Choosing kindness when we feel irritated. Choosing to show love even when life feels busy.
Comfort says, “Do only what is easy.”
Love says, “Do what helps us grow.”
Together
Your challenge
Do one intentional act of love today without being asked.
On your own
To reflect on
- Have I become too comfortable to make an effort in my marriage?
Prayer focus
“Lord, renew our desire to grow together. Help us not to take each other for granted. Teach us to love with intention, effort, and joy. Amen.”
With love and prayer,Sharlene
Vividly in Love offers encouragement and practical tools, not counselling. If your marriage is in a season that needs professional support, Sharlene’s counselling practice, Vivid Resolutions, works with adults and couples across the Caribbean.
This is not a crisis service. Emergency contacts vary across the Caribbean. If there is immediate danger, contact your local police or ambulance service. In Trinidad and Tobago: Police 999, Ambulance 811, or 800-COPE (2673) for a mental-health crisis.