Loving and Liking Your Spouse
Liking, Appreciating and Enjoying Your Spouse
Day 1 of 7 · Sunday 16 August 2026
Scripture reading
“Live joyfully with the wife whom thou lovest all the days of the life of thy vanity, which he hath given thee under the sun, all the days of thy vanity: for that is thy portion in this life, and in thy labour which thou takest under the sun. Live…: Heb. See, or, Enjoy life”
Ecclesiastes 9:9, KJV
Teaching lesson
They were committed to their marriage.
They shared responsibilities, remained faithful, and continued doing what needed to be done.
But somewhere along the way, they stopped enjoying each other.
They still said, "I love you." Yet most conversations were practical, affection felt routine, and being together no longer carried the warmth it once did.
Marriage needs committed love.
But it is also strengthened when spouses continue liking the person they married.
Ecclesiastes encourages a husband to live joyfully with the wife he loves. This reminds us that marriage is not only a covenant to maintain. It is also a relationship God intends us to value and enjoy.
Liking your spouse means appreciating their personality, respecting their character, and enjoying their company. It means seeing them as more than someone who meets needs or completes tasks.
This does not mean every habit will be enjoyable.
It does not require pretending that differences, disappointments, or unresolved issues do not exist.
You can address what needs to change while still remembering that your spouse is a person worthy of kindness, interest, and respect.
Sometimes affection becomes buried beneath familiarity. We stop noticing the humour, generosity, strength, gentleness, or faith that once drew us close.
The good may still be present.
It may simply need to be noticed again.
Ask yourself whether your spouse feels enjoyed or merely tolerated.
A lasting marriage is not built only by refusing to leave. It is strengthened when two people keep turning towards each other and saying, through words and actions, "I still value who you are."
Love protects the covenant.
Liking brings warmth to the companionship within it.
Together
Your challenge
Tell your spouse two qualities you genuinely like about them. Then choose one simple activity you both enjoy and make time to do it together this week.
On your own
To reflect on
- Do my daily words and responses communicate that I enjoy my spouse as a person, or only value what they do?
Prayer focus
“Father, thank You for the person You have given me to love. Help me see my spouse with renewed affection and appreciation. Restore warmth, enjoyment, and genuine friendship between us. In Jesus' name, Amen.”
With love and prayer,Sharlene
Vividly in Love offers encouragement and practical tools, not counselling. If your marriage is in a season that needs professional support, Sharlene’s counselling practice, Vivid Resolutions, works with adults and couples across the Caribbean.
This is not a crisis service. Emergency contacts vary across the Caribbean. If there is immediate danger, contact your local police or ambulance service. In Trinidad and Tobago: Police 999, Ambulance 811, or 800-COPE (2673) for a mental-health crisis.